Writing Your Truth
I consider myself the “cycle-breaker” in my family.
It’s a term going around Instagram and TikTok that you won’t find in any psychology textbook, but it’s spreading. As a cycle-breaker, I see an unhealthy cycle of behavior in the family I grew up in, (there were plenty) and I intentionally work to break that cycle.
Case in point: stories my Mom made up to avoid telling me painful memories about my biological father. My parents divorced before I was a year old because my father was an alcoholic and when he drank he was violent and dangerous.
Throughout my childhood, I’d always ask about Dad.
Where does he live? Is he coming for my birthday? Will we see him this Christmas?
It was too painful for her to talk about the truth, which was my Uncle got a restraining order when I was a baby to keep him away from us because he was so violent when he drank. And after the restraining order lapsed, the precedent was set.
I have three photos of the two of us together, all taken on the same night. I remember meeting him three times before he died of cirrhosis of the liver when I was 12. Recently I found out how young he was when his drinking and violent temper took over his life. And that his behavior was normalized in his Irish family.
Hiding the addiction and mental health issues was so normalized in my family that asking questions about him was often treated like an act of treason. (And I was a kid with lots of questions.)
So, as I got older and committed to therapy and healing work, I realized it was up to me to learn how to ask questions and talk about the mental health skeletons in our closet. And when certain family members were too shut down to talk, finding other people who could relate was healthy (and healing).
I wasn’t breaking a family code. I was finding the support I needed to become more emotionally open and available. And self-aware. (HELL YEAH!)
Finding a safe place with people who can relate is a step towards normalizing how you talk about what you’ve been through while helping others in the process.
You might feel the same way about a different mental health challenge you’re experiencing, especially the secrecy around it.
So that’s why I want to introduce you to
Beth Hayden and the new community she’s creating around her Substack called The Roller Coaster.
It’s a weekly newsletter about entrepreneurship, mental health, and neurodiversity — from a professional content writer who is living with bipolar disorder and ADHD.
It’s time to break the cycle of silence around entrepreneurship and mental health struggles. These two things fit together like puzzle pieces, but few people are willing to openly talk about them. (And with good reason.)
Beth and I first connected through Copyblogger and have become friends and colleagues. I’m so proud of her for pulling back the curtain to open up the conversation around bipolar disorder, ADHD, and entrepreneurship.
With Beth’s professional experience and life experience, she’s creating a community where people can talk about the highs and lows of being an entrepreneur while managing challenging mental health issues. It’s going to be a place to shine a light on how much we need more discourse around these things instead of hiding them in the shadows and trying to make sure no one finds out.
So check out The Roller Coaster, and if you can relate to any of this, subscribe today. The monthly subscription for this Substack ensures that you feel safe commenting on posts because it’s all behind a paywall.
Strap yourself in the car and get ready for a wild ride.
If you know someone who’d be interested in this conversation, please share it with them.
And if you’re interested in starting your own Substack, take a look at my Set Up and Grow Your Substack sessions and set up a discovery call to chat about it.